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Goldie Hawn: positive psychology and happy goals

The dancer, Oscar-winning actress, producer and founder of the MindUP school programme, which teaches three million children globally about positive psychology, shares what is important in her life

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Goldie Hawn: positive psychology and happy goals

Interview by Suzy Greaves

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When I was 11, my one big goal was to be a happy person. I didnโ€™t want to be famous but, at 22, it happened overnight and my life changed. I saw those who took fame too seriously. Their self-worth was fed by it and it made them fragile. I was a curious person. I began to meditate in my 20s and worked on my own self-development, putting my focus on contentment instead.

My father and mother were smart and both had a great sense of humour, but they lived a simple life. They taught by example. I remember watching something about kids with muscular dystrophy on television and Mum said, โ€˜When you grow up, I want you to give 10 cents every week to help others.โ€™

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During 9/11, I wept into an American flag that I was knitting. It was then I decided to start The Hawn Foundation. I had two choices: remain paralysed with grief, or attempt to fix it. The result is MindUP โ€” the signature programme of The Hawn Foundation that teaches children in schools a set of tools to help their mindset.

I was driven to bring a solution to children who were suffering from high levels of stress, and lacking the skills to navigate a complex world. I was concerned about the persistent failure of the education system to help them cope and flourish. The skills and mindfulness practices that weโ€™re teaching have helped three million children globally to improve learning and academic performance โ€“ as well as social and emotional skills that build personal resilience for a lifetime.

Every day, I wake up and ask myself, โ€˜What am I going to do and what do I want?โ€™ Itโ€™s the only way to live your authentic path every day versus living a life controlled by what others think you should do or want you to be.

All my life, people told me that I couldnโ€™t do this and that. But I did it anyway. I produced movies, I wrote books and, at 55, I studied neuroscience and created the MindUP programme.

The programme is the star, Iโ€™m not. Itโ€™s proven itself. I didnโ€™t write the programme, I dreamed it.

My mother taught me that the fish rots from the head. We, as parents and caregivers, need to adopt a mindful practice to become gentler, less stressed and kinder. You can be tough on your kids but always say โ€˜I love youโ€™. All a child needs is love.

I wanted my children to know that I wasnโ€™t perfect. I also needed them to know that I would always be there for them; when they made mistakes. I love them so much. They are such good people, but as kids they werenโ€™t always easy.

You have to want a relationship to work. If one person does and another person doesnโ€™t, youโ€™re dead in the water. But, if youโ€™re both willing to work on it, you need to celebrate it. If itโ€™s really hurting you, or making you feel horrible inside, then you need to get out.

If someone is criticising me, I listen, then ask whatโ€™s right about it. Even if itโ€™s 10 per cent right, be honest with yourself and take anything positive from the interaction, even if it is a criticism. You can use it to make yourself a better person.

The one thing I notice about myself after many years of meditation is that I am very calm. If you stay with a meditation, it will change your brain. You can make changes to your brain with habitual practice, so keep doing it.

For more information on MindUP, see mindup.org/thehawnfoundation. Goldie Hawn was in the UK speaking at purelandfoundation.com, which seeks to promote awareness and change through the exchange of ideas and inspiration.

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