Take your time

Watching loved ones go through important rites often leads us to compare our lives to theirs. ‘It’s not a race to the finish line, so try not to worry if others reach certain stages before you,’ says relationship psychotherapist Denise Knowles. ‘Sometimes part of your journey is to be part of other people’s journeys.’

Don’t idealise their relationship

‘Just because they’re standing at the altar doesn’t mean they suddenly have the perfect relationship,’ says Knowles. ‘Getting married doesn’t mean everything falls magically into place. Putting their relationship on a pedestal will make you feel it’s unachievable. It’s not.’

It’s good to talk

Worried you’ll have to make awkward small talk with strangers? The beauty of weddings is that there’s always a focus for conversation — the happy couple. ‘Chat to people about the ceremony, the food, times you’ve spent with the bride and groom,’ says Knowles.

You’re part of the wedding

By inviting you to their wedding, the couple are showing you how much they value their relationship with you. ‘They’re asking you to witness their union and to continue supporting them as the marriage progresses,’ says Knowles. ‘Think of the day as a contract between you and them, as well as between each other.’